How do we get from here...
...to here????????????????
I'm not sure if you can relate to these thoughts, but when I was pregnant, I had all these expectations of my future and my new "career". I can remember telling my Mom that I wanted to sit down and have her help me make a schedule of cleaning. For example, Monday = dusting, Tuesday = laundry, and so on and so forth. I thought for certain I would be able to stick to this and have a new born, learn how to nurse, make my own baby food and cloth diaper. Now, as unreasonable as this sounds, when we first brought baby girl home, this would've been a BREEZE!! Our child slept 6 hours in the hospital and it only continued when we got home! Week one offered some hurdles w/ nursing, but nothing a lactation consultant and a nipple shield couldn't fix. It was smooth sailing from there! I had this phrase I used to always use..."If it weren't for Eve, our baby girl would be PERFECT!" Sad to say you won't hear those words coming out of my mouth these days!
I now have a 2+ year old w/ a strong will, high spirit, lots of opinions and seems to be addicted to television! WHAT HAVE I DONE...WHAT DID I MISS...HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? It seems somewhere int he mayhem of thinking she was perfect I missed HUGE opportunities for good discipline, a desire to read books, color and play independently! It seems as though I created a MONSTER!!! EEEEEKKKKK!!! I don't hold these things against the little Midget, but mainly against myself. I feel I spent too much time letting her be easy going and occupy herself and I just worked right around that, dragging her places, giving her whatever she wanted and thinking that every act of disobedience was "just a phase" or "teething". Ha, Ha!!
So, where do I go from here? How do I correct these things and maintain my sanity? All suggestions VERY MUCH WELCOMED! We've got a book that Jeff is working through, but it doesn't seem to be at the pace that keeps up with the habits that are forming daily. I need to remember the grace given to me by my Savior and remember that He died for my baby girls little sins and disobedience just the same! It's imperative that I remember that I'm not raising her to just obey me, but I'm shaping her heart to have a desire to obey her God as well. This is a concept I'm just now getting (if you can believe that), and this is the concept that will spare me much heartache as I try and break her will to please me. That's now how it works!
3 comments:
I love the pictures. The comparison is too cute. How do they end up like that?
If its any comfort...and I mean "IF" because I'm still learning myself....she is everything she is supposed to be at this age. You're right, it's up to us to state the boundaries. When I'm going through these phases I find that it helps if I "step up my game", not that I'm aspiring to perfect mothering, but sit more, play more, hold more, let everything else go. Go ALL out, try every new activity (one a day) that you can think of (I have a book, if you want to borrow). Lots of one on one time...just "E" time. You'll find out where trouble spots are, where she's coming from and what you need to be more caring about, more gracious about, more CLEAR about. :) Hope that helps. Tell me what you've learned and remind me when I'm exasperated with R-Dosie!
i dont think anyone is the mother they thought they would be, life gets in the way. but... we do have god's grace and continue on anyway. you and jeff are really trying and that is important.a struggling mother myself, CONSISTENCY is the best advice i can give anyone. these little ones KNOW when we will give up, they count on it. so if, as parents we are consistent with the discipline we have decided on, they will learn what they can and cant get away with and lives and homes will be happier and more peaceful.i would also say this is the hardest area in parenting.
ok, i could write a book on this, but i am sure it would never sell, as my children and i have lots to learn together.
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